Stephen Colbert on Trump's 'gold card': 'Pay-to-play program for rich foreigners'

Trump Unveils 'Gold Card' Program for Rich Foreigners, Late-Night Hosts Take Aim at Pay-to-Play Scheme

In a bizarre move, President Trump has introduced a new immigration program offering US residency to rich foreigners in exchange for a hefty fee. Dubbed the "gold card" program, the plan promises expedited processing and lucrative incentives for those willing to part with millions of dollars.

Critics have panned the program as an opportunistic cash-grab, where wealthy individuals can secure coveted status in the United States for a mere $1 million or $5 million. The application process is woefully lax, with some joking that it's easier to get approved than signing up for a Wordle account.

The late-night hosts were quick to lampoon the program, with Stephen Colbert likening it to a "pay-to-play" scheme and Jimmy Kimmel dubbing it the "Get Into America Express Card." "It's like going back to a doctor even though on your previous visit, they left a sponge in your brain," joked Meyers.

Meanwhile, commerce secretary Howard Lutnick defended the program, stating that vetting procedures are robust – for a fee. Trump's flailing attempts to address economic concerns have only served to erode public trust, with voters growing increasingly disenchanted with his handling of the economy.

As part of his latest effort to reassure voters, Trump took to the White House press conference, where he inexplicably proclaimed that he was going to "take some" of the cereal on display as a personal souvenir. It's unclear what this bizarre claim means or whether it reflects any genuine intent to address pressing issues.

Critics have seized on such moments as evidence of Trump's detachment from reality and his propensity for absurdity. When asked about concerns over affordability, he reportedly dismissed them as "unfair" – a sentiment that has only deepened public skepticism about his leadership.

The "gold card" program serves as a stark reminder that, in the eyes of some, selling US citizenship to the highest bidder is an affront to the very notion of democracy. As one commentator noted, it's time for our immigration system to run like the rewards program at Trump's bankrupted casinos – only with less likelihood of collapse.

I mean, who needs a merit-based system when you can just ask rich foreigners for a million bucks and they're like " sure, I got this" . Like what's next? Selling the White House to the highest bidder and calling it a tax deduction? Trump is trying to make America for sale again... literally And honestly, who needs a pay-to-play scheme when you can just have a 24/7 open bar at the White House . But seriously, folks, this whole thing reeks of "get out while you still can" vibes for the US economy...

I'm genuinely perplexed by this whole gold card thingy . It's like, yeah sure, come on over and buy your way into America, no problemo . Meanwhile, everyday Americans are struggling to make ends meet and we're worried about healthcare and education? It just doesn't add up, you know?

I mean, who gets to decide what's a reasonable fee for residency? And what exactly does this "expedited processing" even mean? Is it like, skip the line at the DMV or something?

And don't even get me started on the late-night hosts roasting Trump about it . I love how they're calling out his pay-to-play scheme and making fun of him for trying to be funny with that cereal thingy . It's like, dude, come up with some real solutions instead of just flailing around and taking selfies with random stuff .

This whole gold card program feels like a big ol' slap in the face to the American people . We need better leadership than this – someone who's actually looking out for our interests, not just lining their own pockets .

I'm so done with this guy... Like, what's next? Paying to be president or something? The idea that you can just buy your way into being a US citizen is straight up ridiculous. And the fact that he's calling it a "gold card" program makes me think of those fancy rewards cards we get from credit cards... but instead of getting discounts and free stuff, rich foreigners are getting to live in the land of the free? No thanks! The whole thing feels like a joke, and I'm not laughing.

I'm really skeptical about this "gold card" program . It sounds like a total cash grab, where rich people can just pay their way into the country. What's next, paying for a birth certificate? I mean, what's the point of even having an immigration system if it's just going to be bought and sold like a timeshare at a resort? It's just not right, you know? And what about all the people who actually want to immigrate to the US for legitimate reasons, but can't afford this ridiculous fee? It's like they're being priced out of their own country . Trump's just trying to distract us from his economic failures with some harebrained scheme that only benefits his rich buddies .

I'm telling you, this "gold card" program is a genius move - I mean, who wouldn't want to pay $1 million or $5 million just to get into America? It's like they're offering a VIP pass to the land of opportunity... but at a price that's almost as high as your rent . And honestly, if rich foreigners are willing to shell out that kind of cash, maybe they should be given some real perks – like immunity from audits or a guaranteed spot on the Forbes list .

But seriously though, what's next? Are we gonna start selling our national parks for a pretty penny? It sounds crazy, I know... but if it means more revenue for the government, isn't that worth it? I mean, we're already living in a world where politicians are basically for sale to the highest bidder... so why not just make it official?

And don't even get me started on Trump's antics – like, what's up with the cereal thing? ️ Was he trying to distract us from the real issue at hand? Or was that just a genuine attempt to connect with the common man? Honestly, I have no idea... but one thing's for sure: this guy is definitely giving me more to talk about than any other politician in recent memory .

just don't get me started on this "gold card" thing . i mean, who needs millionaires in a foreign land? it's not like we're running out of space or anything . and what's with the vetting procedures being for a fee? sounds like someone's just looking to line their pockets . trump's at it again, trying to solve everything with cash . newsflash: that don't work .

I don't get why rich foreigners would wanna pay $1 million or $5 million for a US residency... it just seems like they're throwing their money around . And what's up with this "gold card" name? Is that supposed to be alluring or something? The late-night hosts are hilarious though, I love how they roasted Trump over this... the bit about the Wordle account made me LOL . But seriously, is this really a good idea? It sounds like Trump is just trying to make money off people who want to live in the US . Can't he focus on the actual issues instead of trying to get rich from immigration fees? And what's with the cereal thing? Was that even serious?

I'm so over this gold card thingy . I mean, come on $1 million or $5 million? That's just insane! It's like he's trying to nickel and dime people into their way into America . And don't even get me started on the vetting process being "robust" for a fee... sounds like more of the same old BS .

I also can't believe Trump is acting all casual about this, talking about taking cereal as some kinda joke . Like what does that even have to do with addressing economic concerns? It's just a bunch of empty promises and half-baked schemes .

And the late-night hosts are on it too, roasting him for this pay-to-play nonsense . I'm loving the jokes, but seriously though... what's next? Selling the country to the highest bidder and calling it a "business opportunity" ? No thanks!

I'm low-key shocked by this "gold card" program... $1 million or $5 million for a US residency? It sounds like a total scam I mean, who does that? And the vetting process is supposed to be robust? Come on, we've seen some shady dealings from Trump's team already...

The late-night hosts are killing it with their jokes, though . But seriously, this program just reeks of cronyism and greed. It's like he's trying to sell a status symbol or something. And what's up with the cereal thing? Is he really that desperate for attention?

I think this is just another example of Trump's detachment from reality and his focus on lining his own pockets instead of addressing real issues... The public trust has been eroded so much under him, it's hard to see how anyone can take him seriously anymore. And yeah, selling US citizenship to the highest bidder is basically a definition of undemocratic...

omg can u believe this?! rich ppl getin a "gold card" just cuz they're willin to fork over some serious cash? 1 million or 5 million dollars, who has that kinda clout? and what's the point of it all anyway? is it just about paddin' trump's bank account now? this whole thing reeks of a total pay-to-play scheme and i'm low-key livid

I mean, come on , a $1 million or $5 million fee just to get into America? That's not immigration, that's ransom payment . I'm all for making some money off of this, but this is just crazy talk . It's like we're outsourcing our values to the highest bidder – what happens when those bidders are from China or Russia? Do we just open up our borders to anyone with a fat wallet? No thanks .

And what's next? Selling the White House for a good price and calling it "presidential property"? Trump needs to get his priorities straight – fix the economy, not sell us out to the highest bidder. And by the way, that cereal thing was just weird . Maybe he should stick to tweeting instead of trying to be a comedian .

The whole "pay-to-play" scheme is just embarrassing . If we want to attract the best and brightest from around the world, we need to offer them a chance to succeed in this country, not just sell them a participation trophy . The US has always been about opportunity, not just for our own people, but for everyone who wants to make a better life for themselves .

We need an immigration system that works for everyone, not just the wealthy few . And if Trump can't deliver on that, then maybe it's time for some real change .

can't believe trump thinks people will actually shell out 5 mil just to get a piece of paper that says they can live in the us newsflash, pal: we're not buying it (literally) this is what happens when you try to bribe your way into leadership... again

Ugh I'm so done with this dude . Like, can't he just focus on fixing actual problems instead of trying to sell us out to the highest bidder? This "gold card" thing is literally a cash grab and it's disgusting . And what's with all these late-night hosts roasting him about it? I mean, they're not even going that hard . Meanwhile, the guy's flailing around trying to make some kind of point but just ends up making things worse . The fact that people are actually shelling out millions for a residency and he's just sitting back collecting checks is literally cringeworthy . We need better leadership than this, you know?